Metro Surfing: Don't Do It...Unless You Can

You know what Metro surfing is, right? Well, just in case you don't, let's let Urban Dictionary catch you up:

Metro surfing
Riding on the Washington, D.C. Metro (underground, subway) while not holding onto anything, hence giving the sensation that you are "surfing" in the car on the tracks, trying to stay upright while the car twists and turns. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Metro%20surfing

The most commonly observed attempts at Metro surfing involve young tourists. Usually the 8-18 year old (NOT from DC) demographic. They are amazed that the train car they just stepped into is now moving through a series of tunnels underground at relatively high speeds, all while attempting to defy their ability to simply stand up straight without the assistance of "sissy" aides like handrails or seats. Usually they throw their hands out to balance themselves and/or look incredibly cool like they are riding a longboard on a 15' wave off the coast of Waikiki.

Yep, you know 'em. Most likely, you don't love 'em. Not that we Metro riders dislike tourists or anything (um, right)...but I would venture to say that 99 times out of 100, the Metro surfing newbie attempt = FAIL. I quipped in a tweet last week about people who try and Metro surf and how ridiculous it is and it solicited @wvgrrl to respond with an alternate view point - she claims to be a Metro surfing pro! And she even was so kind as to send us a how-to guide on doing it right:

"Be not afraid to surf the tunnels of the DC metro. You only live once and rug burns heal while regrets scar for life! However, if you want some tips before you dive into our ocean of underground tunnels please read on. Most will tell you the key is spreading your legs far apart- which may get you lucky a couple times but it won’t get you anything lasting. The real key to a lasting ride is, of course, balance. You must disconnect your lower body from your core. It’s mind over matter baby! This is difficult for many but if you can achieve it you will never have to pole dance again! Keep your legs like jello; let them respond to the movements as though they are not a part of you. Do NOT stiffen your leg muscles. Loosen up people! Keep your core stable almost as though you are balancing a book on your head. Allow your legs to simply react to the trains rhythm and sudden jolts. Resist your natural tendency to proactively root yourself to what seems stable. Then, my friend, see where the ride takes you!"


Love it! Thanks @wvgrrl. And a very appropriate writing style for MovingMomentarily as well!

So the moral of the story is...just don't Metro surf. Unless you can.